[:en]Many of us want to manage money skillfully, sensibly and thoughtfully.
We want to get good at negotiating a salary or setting a price reflecting our abilities. We want to spend money consciously, set a budget, and keep up with the budget. We want to look after our 85-year-old self. We want to use it to deepen our relationships with others.
And yet, many of us let other people control the conversation about money. We end up making too many concessions that are not in our favor, focus on the wrong thing and take it too seriously.
Others give away services for free. Many women feel like they don’t have enough experience in their field, even though we do. They tell themselves they are not good with numbers. They end up putting in lots of work before the prospect has committed. Some underestimate the time the service will take and quote a too-low fee. Others feel like they are one of many doing what they do—and belittle their services even before they put them on the market.
Others feel they need to be more consciously spending. They set up a budget and then don’t follow their budget. Others spend, scramble, and get tight with money. Then spend it when they need it and deal with the consequences later.
When you look at your life through the lens of money, you gain access to your whole way of being. Rather than feeling you are doing something wrong with money, see it as a mirror. It is a doorway into greater integration.
Here are some ways to work with feeling wrong around money:
- Look into your interior state to judge your actions around money. Ask yourself, “Do my actions unfold and refresh me?” “Do my actions produce states of turmoil?” You are not making a moral judgment. It is about the resultant state. Is there a washing of your whole self with a greater feeling of life? Or does it produce conflict and blockage?
- Cultivate patience. Patience is seeing the pragmatic reality of the situation. Know your family and societal conditioning have formed patterns that will perpetuate. It is seeing the conditioning with serene detachment.
- Make persistent small efforts to drop the unwholesome. It is not the big efforts that help. The little efforts, the moment-to-moment cutting through verbalisation and fantasy, will succeed.
- Cultivate the strength not to feed these patterns of feeling wrong around money with a constant and calm effort. I encourage you not to fuel the negative.
- Moment by moment, drop the ego identification with feeling wrong around money. See how it manifests in behaviours, thoughts and feelings, leave it behind, and walk on.
The natural energy state will be present when we remove the blockage and unhelpful views around money. You, then, have much more potential than is allowed to work. Your part is to break through the chains that bind you simply.
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